Worn

I’m so tired. I could spend the next 2 weeks in bed and be very happy. It’s not so much that I’m sleepy, but that I’m weary. This semester school had drained me dry; physically and emotionally. I want to stay in my room and hide until it’s all over. The work isn’t hard, it’s just all consuming. As soon as one thing is finished and I think that I have some breathing room, something else comes up. This week is Med/Surg finals. Next week I start OB.

I have clinical today at noon and then I’m done. I’m worried how I will do. I’m not exhausted like I sometimes am, but I just don’t care. I don’t care how I do, I don’t care particularly about the patients, I don’t care about anything but just being done. That isn’t right, but I can’t call up any indignation about it. Just let me be.

I’m also worried about why I’m doing this. Why am I putting myself through this? I don’t know. I haven’t found any area that I really want to working. The thought of having to virtually go to clinicals every day is not a good thought. I don’t want to. I don’t know what I will do when I finally graduate.

I think I must be anemic. I have so little energy. I’m so tired.